Personal Boundaries

Updated: Apr 21

The boundaries that we create around us pretty much serve as our energetic containers. They are the gatekeepers that determine how much of our energy goes out, and what we allow in.

Ideally, the gatekeepers are making their decisions in the best interests of your Higher Self. But more realistically, they are under the influences of the Ego and the guise of Self-Limiting Beliefs.

Understanding where your boundaries are weakly protected is the first step in addressing them. Some important questions to explore are:

  • Who or what violates your perimeters?

  • Is there an area of your life or relationship that makes you feel powerless?

  • What is making you feel drained that should also be filling you up?

Now imagine that you have a clear boundary between you and this person or behavior, and YOU are in control. You have the power and authority to say, "no," because THAT is what is aligned to your highest good.

Exercise: Exploring personal boundaries through writing.

Part 1

  1. Before you begin, I recommend you spend a few moments in meditation and gentle movement to get yourself centered and the energy flowing. Scan your body and identify any areas of tension and bring breath to those spaces.

  2. Once you settle into stillness, ask your (higher) self: "Who do I need to set personal boundaries with that serves my best (and highest) interest?"

  3. Now write freely about it; go beyond the name(s) and explore in what ways you are being affected by the exchange of energy in this relationship.

  4. Is there something that keeps you from doing this? Sometimes you get so USED to the dynamic of relationships that you don't question it, even when it's draining and no longer serving you.

  5. Are the needs of this person more important than your own?

Do you feel guilt or shame at the thought of setting the boundaries that you KNOW you need to come back to your light and your truth? These, my friend, are sure signs that it's time to let that shit go.

Part 2

  1. Imagine you have now have all the courage and self-love that you need to put your needs first, and do the work to release the limiting beliefs holding you back. What does your life look like now?

  2. Write about this. Be creative. Don't hold back.

  3. Repeat this exercise with behaviors or things that you need to set boundaries around for the same reasons. Maybe it's your work, the news, social media, even watching movies or shows that are entertaining, but drama-inducing!

  4. What, inst